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The Elephant in the Marriage

One year ago, almost to the day, I penned my first word in what would become my first completed manuscript. I only shared this project with a few close friends as I was starting out, and each and every one of them has asked the same question that I have heard from almost everyone else when they learn that I have written a manuscript, “What is the book called?” Well, for the past year it has had a place-holder name that is a variation of my dissertation title, but as of February 24, 2015 the book formally known as The Marriage between Perception and Reality has a new name:

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Do You See What I See?

“Do you see what I see?” Isn’t it amazing how often we can be standing right next to someone, looking in the same direction, and see the same thing so differently. Henry David Thoreau​ famously quipped, “It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.”

We can be absolutely convinced that we know what we are looking at, but unaware of just how little we see. If there is a point of friction between you and a friend or a loved one, try looking at the issue from their perspective and be open to seeing what they see. You just might be surprised and strengthen a relationship in the process. Continue reading “Do You See What I See?”

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I Cannot Do It

“I cannot do it,” Joseph replied to Pharaoh, “but God will give Pharaoh the answer he desires.” Genesis 41:16 (NIV)

Many of us reading this are familiar with the story of Joseph being called before Pharaoh to interpret his dream. It is a great story that teaches (and preaches) on so many different levels. Today I would like us to zero in on Joseph’s humble and accurate reply to Pharaoh when he was asked to interpret his dream; Joseph simply said, “I cannot do it.”. The NKJV translates it, “It is not in me.”. So many of us don’t like admitting that we can’t or are unable to do something. Perhaps for fear of what others might think of us, or what we might think of ourselves. We go on through life pretending to others that we can do it and at times we even succeed in convincing ourselves that we can do it. The honest truth is that we cannot, at least not without God. Continue reading “I Cannot Do It”

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Much-Needed Challenge

[:en]A Marriage between Perception and Reality is a treatise that carefully considers the theological, scientific, cultural, gender–unique, and psychological perspectives on marriage. Dr. Karampatsos provides a much-needed challenge to all of us to think beyond our own experience of the marriage dynamic and place a greater emphasis upon the experience of our spouse. One of my two biggest takeaways was to realize that my “gut feeling” is strongly influenced by subjective perceptions and perspectives within myself and therefore needs to be challenged. The other was that compromise is not at the core of a healthy marriage. Rather, marriages grow when each person practices the discipline of thinking in terms of what is best for the marriage, whether or not it is best for the individual. Continue reading “Much-Needed Challenge”